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Forgiveness breaks the yoke of Bitterness!!
DATE: Jul 22 2008, 12:28 pm / MOOD: Dont know

Today, I woke up wanting to pour battery acid on someone's truck because yesterday I was cursed for everything I was worth and slapped in the face with some of the cruelest words you can think of. It made me cry, and I was extremely angry!!!!Why did that person do it?  My best guess is that It all happened because I told this person I can no longer have them associated with my life because we're just not going the same direction. He threw a fit!!! And I didn't sleep so today, I am  a full blown grouch!!!

First of all I thought what he did was TOTALLY out of line, and so 4th grade. However what he did to me I thought personally  he just showed his true colors. I have a point with this story, so just stay with me. I should have known better though because I've heard him speak of other people in such a derogatory manner in the past it hurt my feelings for them.

So all that transpired resulted in that lovely feeling called Bitterness. It crept up and knocked me in my head like a baseball bat. What he did yesterday to me opened up so many wounds that I really didn't think were there. A lot of pent up anger surfaced and the thoughts that ran through my mind were not good and thus far I have been on a man hating ride that has jerked me about like the Texas Giant at 6 Flags in Arlington Texas.

However, here is the flip side.

If I happy to talk in circles I apologize but I know for sure I am not the only one who deals with bitterness towards a person who has done some damage. I stayed up until 1 am Sunday night talking with a person who is having a very hard time forgiving someone else for their past, what has happened, and how it hurt them.

Bitterness is just one of those crazy, crappy things that is like a seed. If you don't watch out It is planted and things that happen in life can water that seed.It grows and if you are not careful not only will it contaminate your mind, but it will affect your physical well being, and your life and if you let it go too far, destroy you.

  I heard  a true story of a man that he was so bitter it literally became toxic to his body.For 30 years He held so much anger and bitterness against one person inside to when he finally did forgive the source that caused his bitterness (which come to find out that person was NOT responsible for the situation), he then lost all control of his bodily functions. He vomited, lost control of his bowels, and urninated all at the same time. I'm sorry to be so graphic but that's how much the bitterness had affected him. 

On the personal side of myself, It has taken me nearly 8 months to forgive one preson for all the pain he put me through for nearly 2 years. Those of you that have read my "break up story" might get a tiny insight about it. That story would take up my whole page...so just to spare you the details it was  just the basic outline of it :)

So, what did I do? My first reaction was to stew over the hot mess but I made a decision that every time I felt that anger, bitterness, pain, and the feeling that I was suffocating because of it all...I had to envision in my mind that I held the situation in my hands, and that I released it along with those feelings. It's kind of like washing your hands with Tide laundry detergent after you work on a car and you get that black grease on you..so is bitterness like the grease on the hands of your soul. Every time you feel that stuff come back up break out that detergent, clean your hands and release that along with the words "I don't agree with what he/she did to me. It hurts, and I'm angry. But, I wll forgive them even if they never apologize"

By doing that you will find that it will kill that seed. For those of you who read your Bible,  Peter asked Jesus, "Lord, how many times must I forgive the offenses of my brother or sister? Seven times?" Jesus answered, "No, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.....

Ok who wants to forgive someone for hurting them 77 freaking times? Yeah not me to be quite honest about it....but why should I expect someone to forgive me for something If I can not forgive another? I will only do damage to my own life. It takes alot like pushing our pride out of the way is one way to start....And besides,Karma isn't very kind....we aallll know that. Or for a better term "You reap what you sow" **ouch**

I want to forgive even though it hurts so that seed of bitterness will not destroy me. I refuse to be intimidated by the things that people do to try to tear me down and hurt me. Further more, I can not compare someone else to another because I was hurt once, twice, or like some of you out there more than a person deserves to be.

But to all of you who have that bitterness inside that seems to fester and be infected like a bad wound...I offer you this challenge. Every day from now on that you wake up...Look into the mirror, Open your mouth, and Speak the strength into your life to forgive that guy or girl who hurt you, and envision that heavy yoke being lifted off from your mind, heart, and soul.

You have the power of life or death in your mouth. Out of the mouth so the heart speaks. You can choose be be angry, bitter, and bound by the chains and the yoke of bitterness or, you can forgive, be released, and experience the feeling of not having that thorn in your flesh. 

What do you do when you get a thorn or a splinter in your hand? You pluck it out with tweezers so your skin will not become infected and you won't be in pain. To me it is the Same scenario with forgiveness(the tweezers) and bitterness (the thorn/splinter)

I promise you that there is a lot more freedom in forgiveness!!!

But only you can make that choice in your life!!

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It will be how much for the extra bag?!?!?!
DATE: Jul 18 2008, 10:41 am / MOOD: Dont know

Yep!! We all know that the the airlines are charging for bags now. I think it's nuts but it's the price you have to pay when you travel nowdays because everything in  the world is going up.  

Ok so that may have been a bit random but at the same time how many times do we have to "pay for extra baggage" in our relationships??  A lot of us sometimes don't realize how much it "costs" until we get there and to be honest, that is a lesson I've had to learn quite a few times.

We all know that every relationship is a learning experience and that each new encounter brings depth to our understanding of male-female relationships. But if this were the case, you'd think that after a while we'd all be experts at relationships....I don't meant o say that we don't learn from each relationship But I think we can say that a lesson learned is knowledge gained.

I really don't think we give ourselves enough time between relationships to get rid of that baggage that we carry so well. So invetibly, we bring it aboard. I think I had a whole storage unit full of crap I couldn't let go and I dragged it with me into the new relationship until I learned it's really really NOT fair to you...And it is surely unfair to the other.

A lot of us I don't think  give ourselves time to really heal and get over the former object of our affection. We bring hurt, pain, and prejudicees into the new relationship that can cause challenges. I think that long-term relationships are absolutely impossible withouth both parties being honest when you’re willing to let your guard down so the other person can see the “real you” and give them the right to look inside of you to see the real hurt you have felt in the past and that’s impossible if you’re still carrying around baggage from a past relationship.

True honesty and trust along with compassion and a loving openness is only gained by time and a sincere want and need for having a fulfilling life and relationship

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Where are you at??
DATE: Mar 25 2008, 12:27 pm / MOOD: Full of life

There are many navigational systems in life. Sometimes a mentor is a navigational influence. Somtimes parents can be navigational influences. Prayer can assist with navigation. Most of us are affected by many contributors. They either contribute to our seccess or they contribute to our dysfunction. But none of us got where we are, good or bad, by ourselves. Someone helped you get there and someone will help you get out.

A drug dealer isn't born the way he is anymore than an astronaut is born an astronaut. Someone helped him get there. Rapists had help getting there. Scientists had help getting there. Navigation is influenced by enviorment.. As children,  we could not control our enviorment, and maybe some of you more than likely suffered some parental issues that maybe hampered your development. But, the good news is that as an adult, if we want to change the destination we can begin using the navigational system we have.

Ask yourself these questions ok? Do you have the right people around you for where you are going? Identify those who are navigationally right for you and build those relationships. Start with approaching them with humility as well as confidence and let them know that they are significant to your success by what you say and how you behave around them.  The WRONG way to approace them is from a place of neediness. Instead, ask yourself what you have to offer them , how you can make their lives better. People Loovvee to be around others who give to them and feel better about giving to those who are themeselves generous.

Lastly, and it kind of goes, maybe it doesn't but I thought I would say it anyway...you cannot base your life on the so-called odds of your demographics, no matter how specific, accurate, or inclusive they may or may not be. Numbers can always be manipulated to support, refute, or justify any position. The key is that you do NOT allow others' perceptions and probablilites to define and decide your destiny. You are the only one who controls the ultimate odds against your own likelihood of success.


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What love is NOT..
DATE: Jan 30 2008, 9:18 am / MOOD: Full of life

Love is not what you feel. Love is what you do. Works....not words...are proof of your love.

Love is not emotion.
Love is not sex!
Love is not the urge to merge.

There is "free Love" and there is "covenant love." And you had better know the difference. Free love takes, and covenant love gives. Free love will give you AIDS and a home in the lake of fire. Covenant love gives you a ring and makes your life as the days on heaven and earth. Your choices have consequences.

America's TV generation watches Brittany Spears get married one day and divorced just 48 hours later. J.Lo married and a week after the wedding, pundits were joyfully responding to the fact that that she stayed married for 7 whole days. With these examples from Hollywood's elite, it's no wonder the concept of covenant love seems strange to America's young generation.

Christianity without love is just another cult.

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DATE: Jan 30 2008, 9:05 am / MOOD: Full of life


1. Love is patient.
Patient love endures. It never gets tired of waiting. Patient love never gives up! Patient love doesn't give up on an alcoholic spouse, a drug addicted son/relative, or a loveless marriage.

2. Love is Kind.
Kindness is love in action. Kindness is the ability to love people more than they deserve.

3.Love does not envy.

Envy possesses, and love releases. When you possess someone, you smother that person. When you smother and hover, the more that person fights to get free. The harder you try, the harder the struggle. It's a fight for emotional survival. TURN LOOSE! Love your partner (if with someone) With out envy! Love without jealousy! Set him free; if he is yours, he will not leave you. If she is not yours, there's nothing on earth you can do to keep her.

4. Love does not boast.
Love does not put itself on display. Love makes no parade.. Love has no pride. Love is needed most by those who deserve it least.

5. Love is not proud.
Remember..God has NO superstars! He has only servants.

6. Love is not rude.
Love is never rude. Love does not behave indecently. Love has good manners.

7. Love is not self seeking.
Love does not insist on its own way. Love does not pursue a selfish advantage. Love does not seek it's own. Love looks for a way to give! Money, can build a house, but it takes love to build a home.

8. Love is not easily angered.
Love is not irritable. Love is not touchy or fretful. Love is not quick to take offense. Love does not walk around with a chip on its shoulder looking for a reason to pout.

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